Friday, June 26, 2009

rewind

so, i´m here, once more, after the chaotic end of my semester slash thesis slash final project slash in-concluded state in which i´m left in after finishing college...
so i´ve almost graduated, and what´s next, the first step is this deeply deep continuos soul searching...
so what have we missed out on?

one:
i recently pinpointed i have minor dyslexia, (a word i had to spell check because it´s a word i think i had never written).. i say minor, because sometimes i can confuse the p for the b or the w for the m.. letters that quickly sort themselves out... anywho. i think i always knew i had it, it just never really got in the way.
i´m smoking a lot.. (which sometimes i love, and sometimes i don´t)
i´m doing exercise, something i hadn´t done in about two years.

ok.. so the world has lately showed me that it´s not what i imagined it would be, but what´s true is that it´s mostly worth living, i had begun limiting my opportunities thinking they weren´t for me, i begun stereotyping myself, what i hadn´t realized is that how the fuck could i know, if i had never tried it. so.. i guess i´m about to try everything.. or at least that´s what´s making sense right now.

my computer´s falling apart, i need a new one.

anywho.. otro dato es q he estado retomando a death cab for cutie, no sé por qué regresé ahorita a ellos.. pero bueno aquí estoy.. y soy su fans. creo q es por qué crecí con ellos y fue todo lo q tocaba mi cd player la segunda vez q fui a europa, y fue la primera vez q viajaba sola y q realmente me sentí sola. (aprendí a crecer mucho en esa época)...

on another note, been thinking a lot about life, love. and etceteras... my conclusion on life, is that we all have a huge power of changing ourselves, of evolution, of growing and progressing.
on love.. a couple of weeks ago, had a conversation with a friend who stated he didn´t believe in love, he didn´t believe in love in the sense that he didn´t think love was forever...i laughed naturally, and then was sent into weeks of analysis and contemplation into this subject, i was surprised on how much thought went into these words.. and then i found myself realizing i had always believed in the same statement, but had never put it into a phrase.. today, now, that i have given it more thought my outermost conclusion is.. whatever love i have to promise, i can only promise it for today...
podrán creer q es la versión diluída del amor, pero yo la veo como la versión condensada, es como todo el amor q tienes, lo das en un solo día y lo vuelves a repetir.

so today, this is what i feel, i feel we only have now (this instant as past/present and future) for everything, for this transformation, for whatever it is that we want... i don´t want to give out this "just do it" sort of trite sentiment, but it´s so true, humans at their most certain moment, is at this instant...
what else have we got?..

and p.s. i´m going blinder as each day passes. i think i should get my eyes checked... or maybe it´s just symbolic.


death cab tracklist.

(something about airplanes.)
your bruise.

(the photo album.)
steadier footing.
a movie script ending.

(transatlanticism.)
title and registration.
the new year.

(plans.)
what sarah said.
i will follow you into the dark.

(narrow stairs.)
bixby canyon bridge.
talking bird.
grapevine fires.

ah, y no tengo nada de sueño, conforme pasan los días, duermo menos.

3 comments:

yarmuk said...

welcome back

SUÉTER said...

hi, suerte

michell halley said...

muchísimas gracias,
yarmuk, vi tú mensaje en el otro blog, ya no te contesté porq te me perdiste..
en fin. ya ando de vuelta..
gracias de nuevo por rolar por acá.